Updating your Facebook status all the time would be hard enough without all your witty “friends” trying to be one-sentence, living David Foster Wallaces.

Envy no more: introducing iWit, the automatic witty Facebook status updater!

Simply launch the iWit app and it will display an algorithmically-derived status of superior wit.  If you like it, just tap the “Update Status” button.  If you don’t like it, press the familiar “reload” icon to see another.  Et voila, your friends will pee their skinny black pants the next time they shake their iPhones.

Settings include multiple languages, profanity and literacy thresholds, and a toggle to, like, overuse “like” or not.  An update is planned for 2009 to support MySpace if it still exists.